Years ago, I remember having a conversation with a friend who felt conflicted between wanting more of life but feeling that if she desired more, would that indicate a lack of appreciation for what she had?
At that time, I knew intuitively that this belief wasn’t quite right. Deep inside, I knew that it is OK to want more, but it got me thinking… If we want more, does that say that we aren’t grateful for what we have right now?
Since then, I’ve read and listened to many teachers who explore the practice of gratitude as well as incorporated a gratitude practice into my own life.
In a way, the concepts of wanting more for one’s life and being grateful and appreciative for what one already has are both independent and interdependent at the same time.
Desires for more and gratitude can, and do, exist independently of each other. One can desire more and not hold any appreciation for what one does have. On the other hand, one can be consciously appreciative of the blessings in one’s life and never think of asking for more.
I guess the question isn’t really about desire negating gratitude and appreciation. For me, the question is more about which state one needs to be in in order to open the door for more blessings to come into one’s life.
Marianne Williamson says it perfectly:
What you appreciate, appreciates.
Desire on its own is simply an expression of what’s missing. The focus is on a void. Desire plus appreciation is an expression of what you are grateful for and opens you up to more, or greater. It’s not about filling a void, it’s about growing what you already have and that which you are already grateful for.
One focuses on the gap, the other focuses on growth. And in life, you get what you focus on.
So remember, in order to grow and expand what you have in life, start from a place of appreciating what you already have and work on amplifying your gratitude practice.
What you appreciate, appreciates.
