Do you know that the results you are experiencing in your life right now are the direct result of your loopy thinking?
Are you…
- Not happy in your career?
- Not happy with your weight or fitness?
- Not happy with your relationships?
- Not happy with your financial situation?
Well, perhaps something external to you may have happened to initiate that situation, but it’s what’s going on inside you that is keeping you in that situation.
Harsh words, I know.
And of course it is much easier to put the blame on someone or something external to you.
However, if there is an area in your life that you aren’t happy with, the only one who can do anything about it is you.
There’s a famous quote by Albert Einstein where he says:
“Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result”.
But it’s exactly what we do. And it’s all because of a thinking/believing loop that our minds operate in.
Here’s a diagram that I’ve created to show the relationship between our beliefs, thoughts, actions and results.
Our beliefs create our thoughts about ourselves, about others and about life. These thoughts determine our actions. Our actions produce results. And then our results confirm our beliefs.
And this cycle goes on and on in automatic mode.
Have a positive belief about yourself or about how things work, then you’ll think a certain way and take certain actions that will give you the results that reinforce those positive beliefs.
But guess what? Have a negative belief about yourself, well, you’ll still get results. They’ll just be the same results that you’re probably experiencing right now.
Let’s look at a couple of examples to demonstrate how the loop works.
If you believe that you’ve got the best-matched talent and experience for a particular type of job, your thoughts will keep you researching those job opportunities. They’ll drive your actions to apply and get those interviews. You’ll believe, think and act like the person who is best suited for that job and you will eventually get that job. Even if it isn’t on the first, fifth or tenth go, or with one organisation or another – because you have that belief about yourself and your skills, you’ll keep taking action to get that job. And when you do get that job, those results will confirm what you believed in the first place.
On the other hand, if you believe that you:
- Don’t have the skills or experience
- Don’t have the right education
- Are too young
- Are too old
- Don’t know the ‘right’ people
Well, if that’s what you believe, then your thoughts will produce actions that will produce the results that will confirm that you don’t have the skills, education, age, etc. If you believe you can’t get that job, even if you do take action towards that goal, your action will be muted. You certainly won’t be presenting yourself as the best suited person for that job. And of course, when you don’t get it, it will just confirm what you already believed about yourself.
The thing is, most of our beliefs have been programmed into us by other people – parents, schools, friends, and even perfect strangers who may have said or done something that then got hard wired into our beliefs. And there are things that we’ve programmed ourselves with – a string of experiences whether they are things that we experienced personally or simply watched on TV.
If we were lucky enough to be brought up in an environment where we received loads of positive reinforcement, recognition and encouragement, we are more likely to carry a supportive belief system about ourselves and about how the world works. But if we have been exposed to a lifetime of criticism, blame or humiliation, then our belief system probably isn’t the healthiest or most supportive.
Our limiting beliefs limit our thinking, which limit our actions, which limit our results.
The good news is that these beliefs can be changed. But the first step is to recognise those beliefs that are holding us back from living our potential. They are referred to as limiting beliefs.
So how do go from limiting beliefs to empowering beliefs?
By paying attention. By noticing when you automatically default to limiting statement such as “I can’t because…”, “it won’t work for me because…”
When you catch yourself making those sorts of statements:
- Stop.
- Reword that statement to something positive.
Instead of saying “I can’t because…”, change your words to “I can because…” and find something – anything – that will turn that negative statement on its head.
I won’t kid you. It will be difficult. Think about it – you’ve been saying those negative statements for a really long time. So when you choose to say or think different words, it will feel clunky and un-natural.
Think of trying to write with your left hand if you are right-handed. It can be done but it will feel strange. Your writing will be wonky. It will feel really uncomfortable. However, do it enough times and your handwriting will become more and more legible. But keep in mind, you will continue to want to go to the default hand if you don’t on purpose catch-yourself and choose to change hands.
It’s the same with limiting beliefs. Your mind has been so hard-wired with those limiting belief and thoughts that they will continue to be the automatic default position your mind first goes to. However, just like choosing to pick up the pen in your left hand instead of the right, you can choose to think an empowering thought when you notice your mind going to its auto-default position.
So, going back to Albert Einstein’s quote: “Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result”, let’s make it a bit more real:
If you want to experience a different results, the things that you are doing will need to change. And the only way you will change your actions is by changing your thinking and shifting those limiting beliefs to beliefs that will empower you.
Change your thinking and your results will change.
