The most common way people give up their power is by thinking they don’t have any. – Alice Walker.
There is a story about two brothers. The boys had lost their mother when they were quite young and were brought up by their father. Their dad, having lost his wife, turned to alcohol as a means to numb his pain. This led him to lose his job, which then escalated his substance abuse and he became violent and abusive to the boys. Things escalated further and he went into a life of crime as a means to support his addictions, and then, once they boys were nearing the end of high school, their dad ended up in jail.
So what happened to the boys?
One brother grew up to graduate from high school. He then worked part-time and put himself through university, went on to get a job, fall in love, get married and have a family of his own.
The other brother took a different path. Just like his dad, he started using drugs, began a life of crime and he, too ended up in jail.
Both brothers were asked the same question: How did you end up living the life you are living?
Amazingly, both brothers gave the same answer: Given my upbringing and the type of father I had, what other choice was there?
Both brothers went through the same traumas growing up yet, they chose two different outcomes for their lives.
We hear stories similar to this all the time. Two people go through similar events or have similar circumstance and end up with two completely different outcomes for their lives.
It can be difficult fact to accept – but we actually do have a choice as to how we respond to past events and circumstances.
Every event, interaction, relationship and decision in the past has led us exactly to this point in time and to the life we are living right now. Where we are today is the culmination of everything that has happened in the past – the good and the bad.
Let’s be clear here – we cannot go back and change the past. We can wish it were different, but wishing won’t go back and erase any hurt that’s been inflicted on us. What we can do however, is choose the effects that we carry with us and apply to our lives in the future.
This quote by Brian Tracy sums it up perfectly:
“I found that every single successful person I’ve ever spoken to had a turning point and the turning point was where they made a clear, specific, unequivocal decision that they were not going to live like this anymore. Some people make that decision at 15 and some people make it at 50, and most never make it at all.”
So remember: someone else, or circumstances completely out of your control, might be responsible for getting you to where you are at right now. However, what you make of your future is your responsibility.
Go and make it a great one.
