What are your triggers?

We all have triggers that can send us off into thinking or behaving negatively, don’t we?  I’m fairly certain that if I asked you what yours were, you might take a moment to think about it, but you’d probably be able to list a few things off the top of your head quite quickly.

For me, I can very quickly list off a couple…  Attempting to use guilt to manipulate me will immediately get my back up.  I can also get pretty angry pretty quickly if I believe someone is being treated unjustly.  And I still take trips down the low self-esteem path at times, too – usually triggered by someone I care about not doing something for me that I expected them to do. (Thankfully I’m getting a bit better at not taking this path too often these days – have a read of my article on Assumptions.)

Well, just as we have triggers that send us off to the dark side of ourselves, there are also triggers that take us to positive places in our minds and emotions.

For example, one of my friends just adores babies. Anybody’s babies.  No matter what is going on in a particular moment, if she hears baby sounds such as cooing or giggling, everything stops and she goes in search of the little being making those sounds.  Any negative emotions she may have been experiencing in that moment just disappear. Her face softens, her voice changes and a big smile appears on her face.

For me it’s cats or kittens.  If you bring one of those to me, even if I’m in the foulest of moods, I immediately turn soft and mushy.  I’m filled with so much love that there is no space, in that moment, for anything else.

I rediscovered another big trigger for me this past weekend.  Music.

Last weekend I took a time-out for myself after a pretty intensive week in my day job.  I spent time listening to my old records and watching old rock videos.  And wow… what an uplift in spirit I felt!

It wasn’t just about remembering the images of gorgeous men with lots of hair (they were the 80s that I was revisiting), it was remembering how I felt at the time.  It was feeling those same feelings.  It was reconnecting with who I was at the time.  I recognised a part of me that I had lost during the years of being a responsible adult, doing the things that you are ‘supposed’ to do in life.

That recognition of myself gave me such a burst of energy.  It was like the real me, long ago buried behind responsibilities and other people’s expectations, came bursting out and saying “Hey!  I’m here!  Let’s go and get on with life!”

While I was in that emotional space, there was no room for self-doubt, self-pity, anger, jealousy or any negative thought or emotion.

My point is, things happen every day that can trigger negative emotions and behaviours in us.  We don’t necessarily have to go looking for them. They just turn up.  However, we can, on purpose, tap into our positive triggers.  OK… If you love babies, you can’t spend all your time going out and looking for them, but you can take a moment to think about them.  Just thinking about something you love brings about the exact same mental and emotional responses as if it were there in reality.

I couldn’t bring my records into work this week, nor could I have YouTube video clips playing on my computer.  But I could take moments throughout the day to play those clips in my mind’s eye.  And I felt great.

Do you know what your positive triggers are? Think about the people you love, or the things you love to do.  Or think about what you used to love to do.  If it makes you smile, or if it makes you feel good, then think about it more often.

Think about it every day.