I’ll be happy when…
I get that job / when I leave this job / when I lose weight / when I get married / when I’m single again / when the kids are out of nappies / when the kids are old enough to walk to school / when the kids are at university / when the kids are married / when I get that new iPhone / when these exams are over / when I get my own car / when I can move out / when the mortgage is paid off / when this problem I’m dealing with is over / etc.
So what will you be until then?
Many of us believe that until everything is as we think it should be we can’t be happy. Not fully happy anyway. We can experience mini bouts of joy, but really, until… (insert your favourite “I’ll be happy when…” statement here), then we just can’t be 100% happy.
The future offers no guarantees. The past is over and done with. All we have is right now. And now is when we can experience happiness.
In my article on taking responsibility for your emotions, I spoke about being at the whim of other people’s words or deeds. The same applies to being at the whim of the unpredictable future, the memories of the past or the circumstances that we find ourselves in.
True happiness, joy and contentment come from within. These are internal states of be-ing that we can tap into rather than looking to external people or events to fill or drain our happiness tanks.
We may not like what’s going on around us. For example, I may not feel happy about my job. But I am joyful inside. I may not feel happy about the long queue I have to wait in. But I am happy in myself. I may not feel happy about the state of world affairs. But I am content with my life.
You will always feel emotions about external things. But you have a choice to be happy.
Even when our lives aren’t perfect, when we haven’t yet achieved those goals, and whilst we are dealing with situations that we may not like, we are still carrying inside of ourselves a huge reservoir of peace, joy and contentment. We don’t need anyone else’s permission to dip into that reservoir nor do we need for everything to be perfectly in place.
What’s the point or the benefit in postponing your happiness until…? What if until… never happens? Does that mean you’ll never be happy? Of course not. So, why not choose happiness now – whilst you’re waiting for those untils…?
It’s your choice.
