This month, we are putting ourselves into the movie world and looking at some of the key roles involved in creating a great movie.
I often joke with a friend of mine about how some people like to think that they are The Director of Life. They have all the scenes already mapped out in their minds as to how everyone else is supposed to act, what they are supposed to think and do. What happens though, is that when things don’t go according to the director’s expectations, the director generally can’t cope too well and throws a hissy-fit. They point the finger, blame everything and everyone for not doing what the director expects them to do. How dare they!
Of course, in almost every movie there are also a number of extras. They are the people that bring colour and movement to the picture, but really, an extra can be anyone. They can be easily replaced. They operate in the background and generally, don’t have any impact to the storyline.
There are also supporting actors who do add value to the story, but still, the story isn’t about them. Their role is to support somebody else’s story.
Then of course there’s always the main actor, or perhaps we can call them “The Star”. They’re the ones who the story is focused on. They’re the ones we follow through all their challenges and triumphs, and often they’re the ones we are hoping have a happy ending in them movie.
Now, if you think of your life as a movie, what role are you playing right now?
Are you The Director? Do you hold all sorts of expectations about how people should be behaving, what they should be doing, how the world works, etc? You don’t actually appear in the movie at all. You sit on the outside and try to get others to do what you want them to do. And what happens when things don’t go your way? Do you throw hiss-fits?
Perhaps you are in a supporting role. Does your life seem to be dedicated to making someone else the star while you stay busy in the background?
Or are you an extra in your own movie? Are you taking a backseat on the set of life, taking up space, but not having any real impact on your story. Do you even have a story?
When it’s your life, you need to be able to fulfil all of those roles – bar one.
First thing to remind yourself of is that you are the star of your own movie because you are the star of your life. It’s your life. Your life is not somebody else’s. Your story isn’t somebody else’s story. Your story is what’s most important for you. You only get one go. In your movie you will have your own challenges and triumphs. And, as the star of your movie, those who love you will want to see you have that happy ending.
You also need to be the director – the difference being, that you are to direct yourself. Put yourself in the movie. Put your energy into directing who you want to be, how you want to be, your own actions, your own storyline and your own happy ending – not putting your energy in trying to direct other people and their stories.
You also need to play your own supporting role. Yes, there might be some people in your story who do support you, but that doesn’t always happen. Not all of us have supportive people in our lives who encourage us in the pursuit of our dreams so, we need to support and encourage ourselves when nobody else does.
The role that you don’t want to take on in the movie of your life is that of the extra. The one that doesn’t matter or that can be replaced.
If that’s the role you seem most comfortable with, well, you need to look at what’s stopping you from wanting to take centre-stage in your life. Is it fear? Is it a belief that you aren’t worthy enough to have your own triumphant story and your own happy ending? Is it that you believe other people and their stories are more important than your own? Because everyone of us has an important story.
Every one of us has a unique purpose that makes a difference to those around us, our communities, and the people we come across otherwise, we wouldn’t have been placed here upon the earth.
Every one of us is a valuable, incredible human being worthy of living a rich and fulfilling life. And it’s up to us to design and create that life that we would truly love to be living.
So, to close, let me share this quote by Sandy Gallagher that I think sums up this month’s post:
Stop working so hard as an extra in your own movie. Write the screenplay of the life you want, with you as the star. See it in your mind, hold on to the image; then you can make it real!
